Underwear meant to help you bust a nut in a stip club

[insane]

Liquid Lapdance http://www.liquidlapdance.com/collections/all-products/products/3-pack-liquid-lapdance

What exactly are Liquid Lapdance pants? Bro... We're glad you asked. According to the product's marketing materials, it's the world's first underpant designed specifically for lap dances. Well what the hell does that mean? Basically, these undergarments do special things with your junk (think duck-and-tuck) so that when you get a lap dance, it "feels like two lubed ass-cheeks sliding up and down." It then proceeds to safely and discreetly conceal your post-orgasam spunk. Depending on your point of view, that's either revolutionary or creepy in a scuzzy, omg-I-have-to-take-a-shower-now type of way.

1. They moisturize and lubricate your penis. A moisturized penis is more sensitive than a dry penis. As the dancer glides her body over yours, you will feel her much more intensely. One reviewer described it as the difference between standard and high definition.

2. They provide you with the space to get fully-erect. Most underwear is not designed to be worn when you're rock hard. Ours is. Expand in comfort.

3. They take the pain out of lap dances. Dry lap dances can be quite painful. Many guys avoid lap dances for this reason. Liquid Lapdance takes the pain out of lap dances. We've tested them with big butts, bony butts and even granny butts! No pain, our testers still made it rain! LL is designed for the grind!

4. They contain your semen. When a guy has an orgasm during a lap dance, it can be quite awkward if he's not wearing Liquid Lapdance. A wet stain typically forms on the guy's crotch, and semen may get on the dancer, where it is often unwelcome. With Liquid Lapdance, you can relax and fully-enjoy the orgasm without worrying about minimizing or containing ejaculation as you might in regular underwear.