Quote:There are four kinds of sex :

HOUSE SEX - When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room.

BEDROOM SEX - After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom.

HALL SEX - After you've been married for many, many years you just pass each other in the hall and say "FUCK YOU"

COURTROOM SEX - When your wife and her lawyer fuck you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you've got.

Quote:A blind man interviews for a job as a quality controller at the local wood mill. The manager calls the blind man into his office and asks him how he expected to do this job since he was blind. The blind man replied he would do it by smell. The manager decides to test him and places a piece of wood in front of him. The manager asks, "What is it without touching it?" The blind man replies, "That�s a good piece of fir." "Correct,� says the manager, �now try this one." "That�s a bad piece of willow," says the blind man. "Correct," answers the manager.

With that, the manager decides to play a trick on the blind man. He get his secretary to lift up her dress and put her crotch in the blind mans face. "I'm confused,� says the blind man, �Can you turn it around?" The secretary turns around and puts her ass in his face. The blind man says, "Oh, you�re trying to fool me! But I know exactly what kind of wood that is. It�s the shit house door off a tuna boat!

Quote:A kindergarten teacher one day is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn't entirely correct, because sometimes it's gray and cloudy".

Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher again replies "If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct either."

Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher looked at him and said "No...But that isn't really a question you want to ask in class discussion." So the student replies, "Then I definitely shit my pants."

Quote:A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this...

'Looking for man with these qualifications; won't beat me up; or run away from me and is great in bed.'

She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, "Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away."

So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?"

Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn't I?"

Red Geist Wrote:Joke of every week:

KillaMo187 Wrote:

Red Geist Wrote:Joke of every week:

The riddle is why would a married man have photos of another man's dick on their computer if they claim to be straight?

fghtffyrdmns Wrote:

KillaMo187 Wrote:

Red Geist Wrote:Joke of every week:

The riddle is why would a married man have photos of another man's dick on their computer if they claim to be straight?

lmao that you'd make an insinuation that anyone wants your dick on their computer (or anywhere near them at all) for sexual reasons. Your chode isn't desirable, sorry dude. It's just a really sad joke. -pats

fghtffyrdmns Wrote:






-cuts off

sTr Wrote:

fghtffyrdmns Wrote:-cuts off

fghtffyrdmns Wrote:

KillaMo187 Wrote:

Red Geist Wrote:Joke of every week:

The riddle is why would a married man have photos of another man's dick on their computer if they claim to be straight?

lmao that you'd make an insinuation that anyone wants your dick on their computer (or anywhere near them at all) for sexual reasons. Your chode isn't desirable, sorry dude. It's just a really sad joke. -pats back

KillaMo187 Wrote:I'm trying reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal hard not to go off on anyone right now so I'd really appreciate it if you just let it go. That goes to both factions in this group.

KillaMo187 Wrote:

fghtffyrdmns Wrote:

KillaMo187 Wrote:

Red Geist Wrote:Joke of every week:

The riddle is why would a married man have photos of another man's dick on their computer if they claim to be straight?

lmao that you'd make an insinuation that anyone wants your dick on their computer (or anywhere near them at all) for sexual reasons. Your chode isn't desirable, sorry dude. It's just a really sad joke. -pats back

I'm trying reaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaal hard not to go off on anyone right now so I'd really appreciate it if you just let it go. That goes to both factions in this group.